"Formerly, when religion was strong and science weak, men mistook magic for medicine; now, when science is strong and religion weak, men mistake medicine for magic."
-- Thomas Szasz, M.D.
The newest in our long line of speaking appliances, our Motivation Station will give you personal trainer-like guidance while you lose weight. With seventeen settings, ranging from coaxing all the way up to cruel and demanding, you can choose your level of motivation needed. The built in speaker projects a threatening male voice, scientifically proven to make people want to run faster. Caution: if left in the "off" position for more than thirty six hours the treadmill will begin to shout obscenities until it is turned back on and it's weight sensor registers a minimum weight of two hundred pounds
As soon as I would get this product I would steal an M-16 from a base and drop this thing on top of bsl labs and george bush's house in texas cause hes a tart.
Of course I hear you say, "after the 20 mins they're off nagging again". Well after you've dolloped your lot in their trap, you're nice and tired and either roll over or retire for a nice sleep. Goodnight !
